what would u do?

I wish sleep would come to me. I wish I dont have to think so much about how this is affecting me, affecting us. its been 2 freaking days and every time I tell myself its gonna get better, i hear another story.. something that makes me want to know why you're doing this to us, to her... Why youre so cold. You speak so positive words,... are these words just words, mere words but no actions? You scare me, you give me nightmares of the future... What if something so bad happens that I can never forgive you for what you did? What do I do?